Category Archives: Holidays

booze, buttons and bows

As you know, I have been honoring Christmas tradition and resisting every temptation to get into the Christmas spirit before its rightful month. But I won’t lie, it was hard to relax and pace myself with spreading my Christmas cheer when Santa was setting up shop the day after Halloween. Ok, I admit, I put out a few festive candles and maybe a bow… or 2, but that was only to change the smell inside the house from stale turkey sandwiches to gingerbread cookies. Our lovely Thanksgiving table has become a storage space for Walmart bags full of half off Christmas decorations that I probably paid too much for, even at 50% off. But finally, IT’S HERE! I can stop living like a hoarder trying to keep my extensive Christmas stock pile a secret from the outside world. Josh can stop being inconvenienced by the house being a mess from of all my stuff….because obviously Christmas decorations in bags, nicely placed on the table is a messier situation than the trail of clothes he left from the front door, to the kitchen and back to the bedroom. The dogs can stop fighting the urge to disobediently urinate on anything but the grass“mark their territory” on anything that is an unfamiliar smell; specifically the 18” dinosaur I bought for my nephew…but it will be fun to watch my 3 year old nephew rip off the wrapping paper and giant bow only to find an old iron box…to answer your question, yes I have become that aunt. And I, well I can finally pump a few jingle jams, hang the garland and DIY (or drink) myself silly.

Ok so I started the DIY a little early, but now I can freely display my Christmas creations without feeling like I have let my neighbors down. I started with my wreath. I wanted a real wreath, but I was fearful it would die before the season was over, which is Christmas decorating no -no # 1. Luckily I found a wreath that wasn’t shiny or already decorated with purple and turquoise birds, it looked as natural as synthetic pine can look.


Notice anything familiar? Maybe a naturally glittered leaf or pinecone? Yes, this Christmas (seeing as my wallet seems to be deflating) I went green and took my Thanksgiving center piece apart to add some flare to my equally natural looking wreath.


A few bells later (because what’s a Christmas wreath without a little jingle) and I was ready to display my Christmas spirit to my neighbors, who live only in my imagination since we never see or hear them.

He seems to like it/he knew I was taking a picture so he did his hair and “accidentally” walked outside (diva).


Since she is always begging me to make her things she can’t make herself (usually all things food and DIY related), I found a little spare time in between creating a Christmas palace Santa would be proud of and putting bows on everything to create a Christmas decoration for the Christmas wonderland of Mama Bear. A button tree!


I told her I would need a plain wooden tree cutout, thinking it wouldn’t be a challenge, it being the Christmas craft season. That proved a little bit harder than I had anticipated, since she searched quite a few stores before bringing me back just a big square piece of green foam. I know I can be pretty crafty and creative, but a flimsy piece of foam board was of no use to me. After glueing what I over exaggerate to be hundreds of buttons, the foam tree would bend like a “16” year old Chinese olympian or a slinky. But just before I could come up with an excuse as to how the dogs ate my project, I found these cardboard christmas trees in a pack of about 100 at a DIY-nerds safe place, Michaels. They were thin and white, but they were at least the shape of a tree already. I glued about 6 together to make the tree stable and once it was dry I began to sporadically glue any and every green button I owned to this little cardboard cutout.

IMG_8451 A few glitter splashes later and nail polish remover to separate my fingers from one another, and I wanted to keep this cutie for myself! But I didn’t, I gave it to Mama and you would have thought I handed her a solid gold tree (it’s the little things that maker her happy).

I have put up a few more candles and bows on the TV, door knobs and various other places. I saved a few for wrapping purposes but I still had more bows than one needs, partly because they were 2 for the price of 1 and then half off of that price (how could I not). With all of these left over bows I was planning on putting them away for a rainy day, but then I realized that my lamps (we would be living in the dark if not given to me by my wonderful sister-in-law), were bottomless. So I stuffed, color coordinated and stuck as many bows up there as I could. IMG_8457

I’m still thinking of places to stick bows, then the next day I take them down and glue them onto a cardboard tree or put them on a Christmas card…the life of a DIY(nerd) is never dull.

And what’s a house decorated for Christmas if not decorated with some festive chocolates? Not a very good one. Josh wanted peppermint bark and peanut butter cup christmas trees. The only problem with that was the peanut butter cups were still in orange packaging…that was just not going to cut the candy bowl standards, so Christmas Kisses it was! They almost look too good to eat.


Before I got too excited too quickly, I stopped myself. We’re holding off on decorating the tree for a few more days and In the meantime we are enjoying the “rainy” San Diego weather and booze we can drink out of a mug!

We also enjoyed the photobooth at our corporate Christmas party last night…a little too much.


Happy decorenting! 🙂

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Glitter with a side of Turkey…

Josh and I took on Thanksgiving at my old roommates house last year which wasn’t necessarily a mistake, it just wasn’t that great. Josh left the sack of crap inside the turkey resulting in only about a quarter of edible turkey, I was just barely out of surgery and my arm was more bummy than the guy that sits outside of the mall begging for my spare change. You would think my right arm (or “the good one”) would be ready to arm wrestle Lou Ferrigno with all the slack and heavy lifting it had taken on since my surgery….but it was weaker than it was before my accident. It was begging for a break, as if it were jealous of the lack of work my left arm was doing.

But not this year! I had so much to do in so little time. This Thanksgiving it is just going to be a couples night, the Haynie’s and the Hayham’s, so the decorations and booze were more for my personal pleasure than for anyone else, cause we all know Josh would eat Thanksgiving dinner on the couch playing Call of Duty and be a happy man. This year Josh knows how to properly cook a turkey (maybe), my arm can bend 2-3 inches more (which means I can move a pot of boiling water without making everybody nervous),  I’ve made more than my fair share of gourmet grilled cheeses (without the use of a microwave) and my mother won’t be following me around the kitchen with a towel and sponge (partly because there isn’t much room for more than about 1 and 1/2 people). It’s not that she’s cleaning up after me, because cleaning up after yourself is the worst part of good home cooking, it’s more that she is kind of like a little dog that gets caught under foot. Every time I turn around I’m stepping on her toes or guiding her away with my feet. It’s better to just give her a bottle of wine and keep her out of the kitchen.

The best part about Josh and I throwing Thanksgiving at our new pad, besides being able to drink to get drunk, is the decorating. When I was 16, hell when I was 22, the best part about any party was knowing there was going to be Vodka and boys. Only 4 years later and I’m more excited about what candles to use or what color scheme is best.  I recently turned my gaudy black picture frame with the pink center into a chalkboard. Josh hated it and probably would have preferred a picture of my ex-boyfriend over the bright pink background. I took the cardboard backing and spray painted (of course) it with chalkboard paint from Michaels . It’s genius, how do they do it?! Anyways then I reversed the natural order of the frame and replaced the glass with the cardboard and used the glass as the backing of the frame. Then I simply bought chalk, an eraser and got busy. Or should I say, my 6 year old boyfriend got busy.

I had planned on writing our Thanksgiving menu on our new chalkboard, but Josh clearly had other ideas. I was just going to erase it Thanksgiving day, but then he looked up at me from his Indian style seated position, with those big baby blues and told me, “You can draw one for Christmas!”. It was so sweet, I couldn’t erase it after that. I added a few pine cones that I stole from our local library’s lawn, and suddenly I was on my way to having somewhat of a Thanksgiving “mantle”.

As far as table settings go, I have bowls, plates and wine glasses ( shout out to my sister’s mother-in-law for getting these adorable fall wine glasses, they’re perfect). Other than that, I’m borrowing 90% from Mama Bear (whom I am most thankful for, for too many reasons to list in parenthesis). I wanted my theme to be one that included candles and glitter, without it looking like a stripper planning a romantic Valentine’s day dinner for her pimp (A.K.A tacky). When I went to Michael’s to find my chalkboard paint, I first found myself wandering around the fake floral section, one which I usually have no interest in being that I am not a 90 year old woman or gay man. But there were rows and rows of  glitter leaves in all different shapes and colors, for 50% off! I obviously could not resist so I bundled up as many as I could find that didn’t look like they belonged in “The Little Mermaid” ride at Disneyland, and this is the center piece I came up.

It started to look more like an Advent wreath and less like a magazine worthy Thanksgiving center piece, but a few pine cones later and it’s almost there. I then realized I didn’t have any napkin rings, and what is a Thanksgiving dinner without napkin rings?! Luckily I have a craft drawer (nerd alert) that houses some left over pipe cleaners I kept for this very situation. I also had a few of those glittery leaves left over from my advent wreath center piece. All of the appropriate ingredients for some homemade, and much needed, napkin rings.

First I folded my napkin,  then I wrapped the pipe cleaner around the napkin , and tied the very natural looking green leaf to the pipe cleaner 

and this is what I came up with. It’ll all come together once wine glasses and turkeys are involved (the cooked kind not the plush kind). Since were on the topic of the plush kind…I said earlier that I was borrowing 90% of my decor from Mama Bear, I mostly meant table cloths, cooking utensils and serving bowls. Boy was I lucky when amongst the mixture of beige linens and a silver cookware collection was a felt turkey bowl. This, well this just happened to be an added bonus…

Apparently it was something I loved from my childhood, something from my childhood I clearly had blocked. When I brought it home Josh was less than pleased. He asked if we could put it away until my parents came over on Thanksgiving day, fearing it would come to life and attack me while he was at work. I giggled and didn’t think about it again. Later, when I was searching for a pen and paper to make another one of my daily lists, this is where “it” was hiding…

The hair is the worst part….

Anyways I’ll post aftermath pictures of  the Hayham/Haynie Thanksgiving partay next time, and until then Happy Thanksgiving!

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